As I dropped my pink, cotton candy scented marker on the kitchen table, my shoulders dropped, and I sighed in relief.
It was 2018, Valentine’s Day was only three days away, and third-grade-me had just finished scribbling the words “Happy Valentine's Day!” 27 times on princess-themed Valentine's Day cards.
That following Friday, I'd brought 27 little boxes of candy hearts and the cards I made to school, handing them out to each classmate during our Valentine's Day party.
For roughly two and a half hours, we bounced around the classroom, dropping the goodies into each other's homemade cardboard boxes, trading candy and simply enjoying our time all together. By the end of the day, each student left the classroom happy, with bags overflowing with treats.
There was no one left out, no competition and no pressure to be the one to bring the most extravagant gifs. Valentine's Day wasn't about who liked who or who got the most attention — it was simply a shared celebration.
But at some point during these last eight years, that simplicity disappeared. Now, Valentine's Day feels more exclusive and demanding than meaningful.
Maybe it was graduating from elementary school and leaving the class parties and gift-giving behind, but instead of growing with us, Valentine's Day has lost its point altogether.
As I've gotten older, it's become easier to see how unnecessary Valentine's Day feels — the holiday is limited and almost entirely for couples, sending the message that love only matters if it's romantic. For a holiday meant to celebrate any kind of friendship, it can feel isolating.
But being in a relationship doesn't make Valentine's Day simpler. It often comes with pressure to go above and beyond.
What should be a fun, thoughtful celebration can turn into a checklist for couples: planning the “perfect” date, picking the right gift, decorating and posting photos online just to prove they're in a relationship.
The day starts to feel less like love and more like performance — a test of effort and creativity that somehow measures how much you care.
On top of that, the holiday is wrapped up in money. Cards, flowers, chocolates, fancy dinner — everything feels like it has a price tag.
That being said, I'm not arguing that spending money or putting in effort for your significant other is necessarily bad. I think proving your love for someone shouldn't always come with a cost, especially on just one specific day of the year.
Looking back to elementary school, Valentine's Day was lighthearted yet meaningful. Cards and candy weren't about proving anything or spending money; they were about sharing a little joy with everyone.
Instead of stressing over fancy chocolates and flowers, we should remember that showing care doesn't need a calendar. Love doesn't need a holiday — it's an everyday effort.
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