True Friendship: Carson and Jack

Through a crowd of screaming, clapping and crying Lancer soccer fans, senior Jack Melvin yells “Where’s Carson? Where’s Carson!”

The varsity soccer team had just taken their final bow after placing in third in state, and Jack was looking for senior Carson Jones to give him a hug. Carson had a feeling Jack would want to congratulate him — he always did that after his games — but he had a team meeting and couldn’t get to Jack after the game.  

“A lot of times kids with Down syndrome are pretty affectionate, not always, but Jack happens to be one of them,” Jack’s mother, Joan, said. “He’s a passionate kid. He’s a hugger.”

Hugs have been their thing since they met. If Jack is feeling sad about getting in trouble with a teacher, Carson knows a hug and working through his feelings as they walk down the hall together can cool him down. If Carson is worried about an upcoming IB math test, he can count on one of Jack’s hugs to clear his mind of derivatives and limits. Carson sees Jack at least twice throughout the school day, and each time isn’t complete without a hug.

But this time, Jack couldn’t give Carson his hug and wouldn’t leave until Carson’s friend promised to give Carson a hug on his behalf.

Jack texted Carson’s mom, Kim, “I need to see Carson. I need to give him a big hug.”

Carson went over to Jack’s house the next day and when he walked through the door, Jack was there to give him more of a “football tackle” than a hug, smiling in his face and telling him, “I love you. You’re my friend.”

Mrs. Jones took pictures of their embrace and shared it on Facebook along with a paragraph reminiscing on their runs to Quicktrip, the Xbox games they play and watching “The Three Stooges,” Jack’s favorite movie — the little moments that make Jack and Carson’s friendship special.

Jack and Carson started making memories in kindergarten. Carson saw Jack as the friend he would always play checkers with and spend boy scout Pinewood derbies with. It wasn’t until second grade that Carson realized Jack had Down syndrome. He didn’t think anything of it — it wouldn’t have mattered to him anyway.

This is their friendship. One full of hugs. One full of learning. One that’s lasted 13 years.

“913-94….”

Jack began memorizing his friends’ phone numbers in elementary school, scheduling playdate after playdate — his record was three lined up for one Saturday.

He called Carson a lot.

“I think that’s how Jack and I got so close, because we first hung out with each other and we both had fun and we both liked each other, so then we continued to hang out and get closer every time,” Carson said.

Aside from multiple playdates each week, they got to know each other through having classes together at Briarwood Elementary, playing on the same basketball and soccer team and cub scouts. The practices and bi-monthly scout meetings meant plenty of time for the two to trade knock-knock jokes and bond over the board game SORRY.

“It’s just one of those things that just happened,” Kim said. “And it was really cool to get to know [Jack]. He’s got an amazing personality and the ability to make you smile or laugh, definitely just feel loved, for sure. He loves his friends. It’s immeasurable.” 

Jack’s parents told eight-year-old Jack that he could only invite one friend over for his first sleepover. So of course, he called Carson.

They moved an extra bed into Jack’s bedroom and watched a movie down in the basement.

Carson doesn’t remember anything about the movie, but he remembers it was one of the first nights that Jack hadn’t gone into his parent’s bedroom in the middle of the night — he slept the whole night in his own bed.

“I think [Jack] knew he could trust Carson,” Joan said. “He felt like Carson protected him, kind of like a big brother.”

Almost a decade later, a picture of the two smiling in their pirate and dinosaur pajamas from that night is stuck on the cork board right above Carson’s bed.

They’ve grown out of their pirate and dinosaur pajama pants, but as they’re finishing up the first semester of their senior year, they haven’t grown out of their friendship — and their hugs. They screamed for Sporting KC players at a game in eighth grade, Carson persuaded Jack to conquer his fear of the lazy river at Matt Ross this past summer and Jack won Homecoming King this year, running to Carson, a fellow candidate, for a hug right after.

Not only has their friendship remained unwavering, but the pair has also taught valuable lessons to one another.

Jack has taught Carson compassion. He sees the way that Jack is always telling everyone around him that he loves them and how he’ll say hello to almost anyone — even if he doesn’t know them.

Jack’s consistent support has spread to Carson as well. Carson wants to be there for others like Jack is for him — whether it’s going to a friend’s orchestra concert or the SME Special Olympics.

In return, Carson has helped Jack become conscious of what he says. Jack sometimes imitates inappropriate lines he hears from music, so Carson will remind him to keep some thoughts to himself.

Carson started a three-strike method with Jack. He has three shots when they’re together — no rude comments or using the middle finger. If he succeeds, they’ll stop by QuikTrip for Jack’s favorite drink: root beer.

They’ve both learned to be patient with each other, whether it’s Carson relaxing Jack if they are stuck in a long line or Jack explaining an Xbox game to Carson.  

“He makes me a better person, and I think that goes both ways with both of us,” Carson said. “We both make each other better people and we both get to have a great friend out of it, too.”

“Melvin Curry!”

Swish.

Jack sinks his own version of a three-pointer — feet stationed all the way at the end of his driveway, almost standing in the street. Carson is there and bounces the ball back to Jack, whose next shot goes straight through the hoop yet again.

Jack knows he’s better than Carson at basketball, especially since Carson spends his time kicking soccer balls rather than dribbling basketballs. Jack says he always wins and doesn’t let Carson forget it, teasing him as they play and shouting “No!” instead of playing defense when Carson tries to go in for a layup.

But amid the smack talk, Jack doesn’t forget to shout out a reminder that he loves his buddy Carson. And when Carson slams the alley-oop that Jack set him up for, Jack is all smiles.

Sometimes Jack gets upset with Carson if he doesn’t pass the basketball to him or takes a shot for himself, but Carson is teaching him to be patient with others. Joan says Carson doesn’t always give Jack what he wants, which is a good thing. He has to learn.

Once finished with shooting hoops, Jack cools down with Bruno Mars songs, dancing along to Mars’ Super Bowl and music award performances on Youtube. Carson just watches as Jack sways back and forth to “Runaway Baby” and belts out the lyrics to Mars’ rendition of  “Valerie.”

Even though Carson isn’t dancing with him, he’s sitting right behind Jack, suggesting new songs and singing along.

Jack likes to scream “Carson’s in my heart!” or “You’re my buddy Carson!” at Carson’s soccer games and wants to be his only cheerleader. According to Carson, Jack also gets “overprotective” when Carson is playing and doesn’t like it when the other players pull on his jersey or steal the ball from him.

Carson appreciates Jack’s support, and even when he tries to tune out the noise coming from the bleachers, he can’t miss Jack’s cheers — he’s always the loudest person there. And when Carson is subbed out for a water break, Jack is yelling for him, usually asking why he isn’t on the field anymore or telling him to get back in the game.

Going to almost every game, Jack’s support radiates to everyone — leading the student section in his favorite “LAN…CERS” chant, and sometimes even making his way over to the parents to say hi to every familiar face.

There, he finds Kim who he recognizes from the constant FaceTime calls and days with Carson.

He shouts to her, “Kim, Carson has my heart!”

She turns to Jack and smiles, “I know he does.”