Success in Service

Junior Julia Sprouse has a lot she needs to remember.

Sprouse has to remember that Mr. Hirsh is allergic to black pepper; something she discovered when she accidentally served him peppered salmon with his Jell-O and skim milk. She remembers because his allergic reaction resulted in Sprouse having to clear his vomit-covered plates.

She has to remember that Ms. Smith needs ketchup as soon as she’s seated, and later a cup of ice cream. Hopefully not to be eaten together, but Sprouse still isn’t sure.

In a place where silver hair and occasional forgetfulness are common, Sprouse has needed to gain a keen memory, patience and respect while serving as a waitress at The Forum, a retirement community near her home in Leawood. She knew she didn’t want to have a job where she would be sitting in a store alone. Sprouse would rather work with people. She feels a true sense of community at The Forum with both her coworkers and the residents.

The Forum is the place where she eats leftover cookies in the kitchen with the staff. It’s the place where she knows what some residents will order without them having to ask. It’s the place where she’s learned valuable lessons that come with serving the elderly.

At first, Sprouse says she wasn’t used to serving others and having the patience that this job requires. She’d never had to deal with anything like people constantly asking her for refills, requesting details about the ‘catch of the day,’ or taking five minutes to read the nine items on The Forum menu.

“Respect is another thing I’ve learned [in addition to patience],” Sprouse said. “If I see an old lady sitting alone, she’s obviously a widow, and I’ll try to make conversation with her. You can’t have sympathy because then you’d feel awful the whole time but you do have to have a good energy and respect for them.”

Since beginning work in January of this year, Sprouse has spent four days a week serving four tables in the dining room. Although the residents that sit in her section change daily, her routine as a waitress does not. She brings out Jell-O or soup as an appetizer, then takes the residents’ drink, meal and dessert orders.

For Sprouse, it’s hardly work at all. She loves seeing how appreciative the residents are of her simply bringing their food and making conversation with them.

“[The residents] always get so excited about seeing you,” Sprouse said. “I don’t have any grandparents in Kansas City so it’s fun how they’re all so loving. They just think it’s amazing how I can carry all the plates. They always compliment me, they’re sweet.”

Sprouse believes her age makes her a new and interesting person for the residents to interact with. Sprouse has favorite residents that sit in her section more often than others.

There’s Mrs. Anderson, who color coordinates her purse and shirt every day. She always gives Sprouse a good ‘server report card’ with at least 10 plus signs. There’s Ms. Smith, the one who must have ketchup, who says “I love you, I love you” to Sprouse, holding her hand or hugging her. There are the eight bachelors who come early to dinner to get the large round table in the center. There’s the woman simply known as “Cookie” who has to have the menu read to her because her vision is slowly going bad. Sprouse always has to give Cookie a heads up as to what type of food she’s placing in front of her.

Mostly, the residents are interested in what she does when she’s not working at The Forum. Once they knew she was a dancer, residents asked Sprouse about ballet, especially residents who had been dancers as children.

Sprouse often serves a woman named Marilyn who used to be a dancer. She orders the same salad with shredded lettuce, cheddar cheese and ranch every day, which over time, Sprouse and Marilyn have come to call the “Marilyn Salad.” When Marilyn was a young girl during WWII, she and her sister couldn’t afford dance lessons, so her mom became the pianist at the studio to pay for her daughters’ ballet classes. Sprouse respects the commitment of Marilyn and her family to something that Sprouse has done her whole life.

Sprouse says their ability to talk about dance has made the times when she serves Marilyn much more meaningful. In addition to her own conversations with the residents, she enjoys overhearing what they talk about over meals. She says it’s helped her gain perspective about the older generation.

“A lot of [the residents] talk about earlier years, experiences during the war and things like that,” Sprouse said. “They talk about the past a lot more than the present. They talk about their grandkids, too. You can tell when their family has called to give them an update so they tell everyone what their grandkids are up to.”

Sprouse says she found it cute when she heard a newer resident say “I just love it here, it’s like having dinner with your friends every night.” However, some residents present more of a challenge in terms of practicing patience and respect.

Once, Sprouse had to break the news to residents that fish would not be served at dinner. One woman threw her napkin and stormed out of the dining hall. Sprouse says she tries to be as apologetic as possible when instances like this occur, but that some residents simply have bitter personalities.

“I’ll go up to [some residents] and say ‘Hi I’m Julia, how are you?’ and they’ll say ‘7UP no ice,’” Sprouse said. “There are just people that aren’t fun to serve, aren’t fun to talk to, but then I can hear some people at the end who say ‘This was so fun, let’s do it again,’ who stay forever after dessert hanging out and talking with one another.”

Four times a week, she serves a meal to 96 people in their home. Four times a week she overhears about life experiences of the past. Four times a week she has to remember individual “likes” and “dislikes.” Most importantly, four times a week Sprouse practices patience and respect for her friends at The Forum.

And that’s something she will remember.