Author Spotlight
Kat Buchanan
“Man, unlike any other thing organic or inorganic in the universe, grows beyond his work, walks up the stairs of his concepts, emerges ahead of his accomplishments.” – -John Steinbeck, The Grapes of Wrath, Ch. 14
Senior Kaevan Tavakolinia stands on the far right of the stage, just in front of the navy blue curtain. He yanks his cap off of his head and runs his fingers through the tuft of bangs swooping across his forehead. His figure is still as he stands with his hand in his hair for a long moment until he turns and places the cap back in position. As the auditorium dims into darkness and the curtain rises, Kaevan disappears.
When he returns to the stage he is Tom Joad, the lead character of John Steinbeck’s The Grapes of Wrath.
Tom Joad speaks in a comforting Southern twang. He wears a light blue button down shirt, light wash work jeans and clunky outdoor boots. He speaks tersely but often. He’s brooding.
He doesn’t take much from other people and loves his family deeply. He lives in the present moment, using what the world gives him. He’s been through ups and downs, highs and lows. The future does not concern him. He believes that mankind is connected, that we as humans have responsibility to one another.
Kaevan Tavakolinia has no trouble relating to his character.
***
“[He’s] got a-holt of somepin, an’ it’s too big for him, an’ it’s too big for me.”
– John Steinbeck, The Grapes of Wrath, Ch. 6
Kaevan is eight years old, sitting in his sister’s room. His sister Angela is a teenager, 11 years older than him. Band posters cover the walls of her room, Jimmy Hendrix and Metallica frozen in poses of perpetual rock. Lava lamps glow lazily around the room and the string of chili pepper lights covering the frame of the window clangs against the glass. The room is familiar to Kaevan.
Angela nods her head to the music coming from her CD player, smiling at Kaevan and motioning for him to get up and dance. Despite their age difference, the two had always shared a strong relationship.
Kaevan had never lived with his sister. She stayed at their grandparents’ house while he lived with his parents and younger brother, Kamran. Though the two were split apart, Kaevan still found time to go over to Grandma’s and see Angela. He told her all about his newfound love for Pokémon and she introduced him to South Park, a show he wasn’t allowed to watch at home. The two bonded over Nana cookies – “the best cookies in the world” – cookies made for them by their grandmother.
Elementary school was difficult for Kaevan. At Highlands Elementary he was the big, fat kid. He struggled with self-esteem and became introverted and quiet around his peers.
He would spend his time at his grandparents’ house, listening to his sister’s band play and talking with his family members. He alternated between his own home with his parents and younger brother and his getaway at his grandparents’. His family took him as he was, especially his mother Denise Tavakolinia.
“You know when your neighbors get used to seeing kids running around your yard dressed in crazy outfits, wacky colors, rocker duds, or in drag, then you have a performing arts kid,” Denise said.
As he grew older, Kaevan joined the choir at Indian Hills Middle School. Soon after, he became an active member in the theater and began taking drama classes. Being around other people that shared his same interests helped Kaevan to come out of his shell. He started making friends and being himself at school.
Performance was the main way that Kaevan could connect with his peers.
Being a part of something bigger than himself was different for him. Kaevan loved the feeling of being around people, he loved forming relationships. He began telling his friends everything, letting them into his life.
He came to East eager to join the theater, eager to continue building his friendships and meeting new people.
He trusted anyone and everyone. Making friends came easy to him once he joined theater and he was taken in by the seniors and his peers. He landed a major role as Señor Morales in “Wild Oats” during his first semester at East and he began to feel as though he belonged. He knew what he wanted to do with his life.
As soon as Kaevan had become comfortable, things began to change. His social life gradually declined as he completed his freshman year. His friends stopped wanting to spend time with him; they found his outgoing side to be overbearing.
“All my friends were starting to think I was weird because I was being loud again and kinda being myself and being obnoxious Kaevan and just doing my own thing,” Kaevan said.
He found himself in unhealthy relationships that ended with hurt feelings on both sides. His grades fell and he struggled with his own self condemnation.
He took a break from his fast-paced life.
***
“In the souls of the people the grapes of wrath are filling and growing heavy, growing heavy for the vintage.”
– John Steinbeck, The Grapes of Wrath, Chapter 25
Kaevan’s room is dark. His curtains are drawn. Music plays softly from his computer. He lies in his bed, curled into fetal position under the covers. He’s crying.
The detachment Kaevan had felt in elementary school was back. He was clinically depressed, wanting nothing to do with other people. He was isolating himself from everyone he loved.
“I think a lot of my depression came from being so… dependent on people. I would become so attached and I would like, be in love with people, and be like, ‘I’ll do anything! I’ll be your best friend!’”
The depression had started during Kaevan’s sophomore year and continued off and on throughout high school. His group of friends had rejected him, all at once. He was left empty, with no one to talk to about how he felt. He stopped participating in theater activities after a “falling out” with the people involved.
“I trusted everyone and it left me in a very vulnerable place, but I was okay with it because I cared about people. And whether or not they meant to, they usually ended up hurting me. And I couldn’t blame them for it because I was the one who put all the information out there,” Kaevan said.
At the end of his junior year when the depression was at its peak, Kaevan started going to therapy. His sessions with his social worker, Jane, helped him through his lows. He liked having “a person to talk to that was completely unbiased.” He began taking antidepressant medication and getting himself back on track for his senior year.
In September, he auditioned for the East production of “The Grapes of Wrath.” He read a few chapters of the novel and memorized some lines from the script ten minutes before his name was called. He recited the lines with ease, and a few days later he checked the cast list that was posted.
“Kaevan……Tom Joad”
Performing arts teacher Brian Cappello has watched Kaevan grow as an actor and recognizes Kaevan’s talents on the stage. Capello says that Kaevan’s performance is “everything he wants” for the role of Tom Joad.
“Tom is a complex, advanced role and Kaevan’s done enough experience wise (to handle it),” Cappello said.
The idea of being the lead didn’t sink in automatically. It took time for Kaevan to realize the meaning of the role and tap into his connection with the character.
He took the responsibility in stride, practicing his roughly 400 lines with peers and reading chapters from Steinbeck’s novel. He stopped focusing on homework in other classes, leaving weeks of work undone.
Kaevan’s mother was fully supportive. She was used to Kaevan’s constant drive towards achieving his goals; she raised him and his siblings that way.
“I tell them that no one is going to believe in them if they do not believe in themselves. They are their own best advocate or worst saboteur, it’s their choice,” Denise said.
Once again, Kaevan Tavakolinia is a part of something bigger than himself. He finds it frightening sometimes, but he knows it’s what he wants to do for the rest of his life. He wants to continue to perform, to connect with other people on a real level.
“There are so many artists that have done things for me and helped me through different times in different ways that have no idea that I exist. I’d like to be one of those people, I’d like to matter to someone,” Kaevan said.
***
“Maybe it’s like Casy says. Maybe a man don’t got a soul of his own, but a small piece of a bigger one.”
– John Steinbeck, The Grapes of Wrath, Chapter 28
Through reading the script and practicing his lines, Kaevan has found deeper meaning in the play. He’s formed a deeper relationship with his character.
“This play has very much to do with the fact that we’re all connected and that humans in general have responsibility to one another, and that’s kind of gone by the wayside now. I just feel that this is an important piece because it shows that when you hear that a person died, or a person’s house got burnt down… that’s a person. That’s not just a number, it’s a person,” Kaevan said.
Kaevan Tavakolinia speaks in a loud, friendly voice. He wears Pokemon jackets and torn up Converse sneakers with song titles scribbled on the sides. He rambles confidently. He’s welcoming.
He doesn’t take much from other people and loves his family deeply. He lives in the present moment, using what the world gives him. He’s been through ups and downs, highs and lows. The future does not concern him. He believes that mankind is connected, that we as humans have responsibility to one another.
Though the future is illusory, Kaevan has quiet confidence in his own. He will continue to pursue acting and music, not for monetary gain, but because it’s what he loves to do.
He will continue to perform as a way to relate with others.
“That’s what I wanna do for the rest of my life. Be with people.”
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