From Mean Girls to High School Musical, our generation grew up watching movies filled with scenes depicting high school peer pressure. Friends convincing the main character to throw a huge rager while their parents are gone or even something as simple as getting pushed towards your crush. And now that we’re actually in high school surrounded by hundreds of new and different people, these movie scenes are feeling a little too familiar.
Students’ behavior is largely influenced by what their peers are doing –– whether it’s appearance, interests, other friends, involvement or daily routines. But there’s negative and positive sides to that pressure.
Back in the fourth grade, the store Ivivva, the young girl version of Lululemon, became the new “thing.” I remember begging my mom to buy me new tank tops and cute green and blue patterned shorts, not necessarily because I wanted them, but because I’d seen my friends wearing them. I felt the pressure that if I didn’t, I wouldn’t keep those friends.
I didn’t wear that stuff anymore than my free Nike hammydown shorts, but I thought my world would end if I didn’t use that money from my lemonade stand to really feel “cool”.
In our teen years, everyone wants to “fit in,” which can result in succumbing to peer pressure. Media portrayal and discussions in elementary school seem to focus on the negative outcomes of peer pressure, but some peer pressure can actually be positive and encouraging, pushing you out of your comfort zone and meeting new people who don’t just consist in the same circle of friends.
Usually when someone hears the phrase “peer pressure,” they immediately think of being pressured to try a puff of a cigarette or “just a sip” of vodka –– especially parents.
They picture their kid behind bars after warning them before heading over to a friends basement hangout “Don’t feel pressured to do anything, okay? I’ll come pick you up.” That’s the typical parent mindset. Yet parents and teenagers alike fail to recognize that some peer pressure is healthy and can push people toward positive growth.
As I watched all three of my older siblings throughout their high school years get involved with the Student Council, SHARE, sports and other general activities within the school, I knew I’d do the same once I got to East.
When I saw my peers getting into sports and activities that they hadn’t even tried yet, I felt positively pressured to do the same –– adding onto that already developed watching my sisters and brother take on East. Getting involved helped me meet new people and figure out important skills, like kindness from participating in an all girls National Charity League or communication from screaming across the soccer field.
Friend groups can even help shape one’s personality, as being surrounded by good behavior can influence someone to improve themselves. For example, if you see your friend walk into the cafeteria with someone new or go try out a new yoga class, over time you’ll be more inclined to mirror that behavior and do the same.
I know I’ve been placed in bad situations involving peer pressure, but even uncomfortable experiences ultimately help me in a positive way.
Sitting in the basement of my friend’s house in eighth grade I hear in my ear, “C’mon Anna just one hit.” I know I can make up my own mind, but what if I lose all my friends? I know my mom would be so upset with me, but whatever, right?
Obviously, I have now realized that if I did or didn’t take one puff nothing would happen with my friends. Just a simple “no thank you” is all that is needed, and if your friends don’t accept that, that is when it is time to take a step back from the negative peer pressure and reassess. Although, that is what peer pressure does. Makes you uncomfortable and overthink to the point where both outcomes are bad, but then you learn from it and know how to avoid those negative experiences and don’t feel the need to “be cool.”
For me, seeing my peers’ fashion and what is classified as “in style” within our class or school influences my decisions as much as I wouldn’t like to admit it. Being around a group of people a good amount usually results in appropriating the same behaviors and similar situations, whether they be good or bad.
It’s important to reflect on situations you’ve been in. If you look back and feel that your actions weren’t who you really are, you can work to change how you handled it and avoid getting into the same situation in the future.
While peer pressure has its negative moments and can result in consequences, feeling a positive kind of pressure that forces you to step out of your comfort zone and somehow grow from that experience is something that can provide nothing but improvement.