Picky About Pumpkins: why the popular fall food is overrated

Call me the Grinch of fall, but pumpkins are overrated. From the end of September up until peppermint takes over for winter, you can’t walk into a store without the sickly sweet smell of pumpkin overwhelming your senses. This pumpkin obsession that continues to grow more extreme every fall is concerning, and honestly, doesn’t make that much sense. What’s so great about pumpkins anyway? 

Now don’t get me wrong, fall wouldn’t be fall without the classics like pumpkin pie and pumpkin spice lattes. But pumpkin-flavored Cheerios, Pringles, and cough drops? That’s where I draw the line. 

To me, everything about pumpkins is nauseating — the smell resembles a rotting fruit and the mediocre taste, overpowered with its slimy texture, will never be appetizing to me. 

For two long months pumpkin-flavored everything takes the spotlight, while apple and cinnamon have to sit back and watch. I’d much rather walk into a store and get hit with a blast of spiced apple scent — not overpowering “Pumpkin Marshmallow Fire Daydreams.”

Think of an apple: crisp, sweet with a subtle tartness, the perfect fall fruit that can — and should — be added and flavored to all sorts of foods. 

Who needs Pumpkin Frosted Mini Wheats when we have caramel apples, candy apples, apple cider, apple crisp — the list goes on. And the best part is: each apple variation is distinctly unique. One piece of pumpkin pie and that’s all I need to fulfill my fall cravings — everything else in the pumpkin realm really just tastes like a candle.

I think what’s so appealing about apple-flavored items is that they’re naturally sweet. Something about the artificial pumpkin flavor is sickening, leaving my mouth with its syrupy aftertaste for the rest of the day. 

To all the pumpkin lovers: I’m not saying your beloved orange squash should go away all together. I just think the other, equally as notable, fall foods and flavors should be shown the same amount of love.

I’ll wait for the day when I don’t have to walk through Target’s Halloween aisle with the obnoxious orange packaging of yet another pumpkin-flavored item getting in the way of my fall spirit. 

Until then, you’ll find me carving my latest Jack-O-Lantern design into a crisp red apple while sipping cinnamon-spiced apple cider after a successful day of apple picking.