Not So Royal

Photo by Ally Griffith

Graphic by Lily Billingsley  

To clarify — I’m not some cracker jack popping, take me out to the ball game singing girl. Honestly, the only reason I started going to Royals games was the way Eric Hosmer’s pants fit. But thanks to all my days at 3 & 2 baseball fields for my brother’s little league games and three straight years of Royals’ 40 game season ticket packages (which we stopped buying), I love the game.

However, this past season I’ve lost Hosmer to the San Diego Padres and haven’t gotten the chance to admire his cute helmet hair from my seats in section 234. I haven’t spent an hour trying to flag down the worker selling frozen lemonades. I haven’t even gone to a game. Not a single one.

You know why? Because they’re bad. Not they-might-lose-in-the-second-round-of-the-playoffs bad but mid-2000’s bad.

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With the boys in blue becoming the boys in a state of peril this season, I’ve been trying to focus on happier times.

Like the time when the ball boy gave me Pablo Sandoval’s foul ball during game one of the 2014 World Series. Or the time 800,000 Kansas Citians all wearing the same Rally House t-shirt showed up to Union Station to celebrate the 2015 World Series victory. Even the time when my social studies teacher projected the Royals’ eighth inning comeback against the Astros in their division playoffs when we should’ve been analyzing Lincoln’s Gettysburg Address.

But those memories are overshadowed by a 2018 team of players who embody the finger hitting the “downgrade” button meme.

Whit Merrifield, Alcides Escobar and Salvador Perez offer little comfort in making up for the gaping hole that Hosmer, Lorenzo Cain and Mike Moustakas left in their wake. Not even Alex Gordon’s presence can make up for the signature “MOOOOSE” being absent from Kauffman Stadium.

The team also lost closing pitchers like Kelvin Herrera and – my favorite Aussie and the only athlete who can rock sports goggles – Peter Moylan. Without a solid bullpen, a weak defense and an underperforming offense, it’s no wonder ESPN is predicting they’ll end the season with 113 losses — joining a list of seven teams since 1980 to lose 107 or more games, according to SB Nation.

But it’s not all about who they lost — it’s also who they’re starting. Alcides Escobar — arguably one of the worst players in baseball — starting almost every game for the Royals is not doing them any favors. His first day off after 421 consecutive starts was July 8, 2014. According to Royals Review, Escobar’s OBP since 2016 is .275, making him the caboose among all qualified players in the MLB. OBP measures how frequently a player reaches base.

Maybe Escobar should take a day off. Or a month.

The guest pitchers who throw out the first pitch at home games would probably have a lower ERA — mean number of runs given up per nine innings pitched —  than the collective Royals pitchers. Their 5.23 ERA average puts them in last place according to ESPN.

Part of the pitching problem is the Royals’ farm system, which is a practice squad dedicated to developing young players who can move up if they perform well. Having the option to bring up a promising prospect is ideal. But the Royals don’t have that option.

According to Bleacher Report, their farm system is ranked 24 out of thirty MLB teams. When they were at the height of their World Series days in 2014, the system was ranked eighth. Is there a connection between developing pitchers and winning? I think yes.

It’s not just on the pitchers though, we can’t expect Danny Duffy to pitch a perfect game every time. The offense has to act as a cushion, and fill in for the lack of good pitching. But that’s hard for an offense with a .241 batting average.

During the month of June, the offense scored only 53 times, which is 25 less runs than the team ranked second-to-last in the MLB. Ouch. If only HOTsmer was here to recreate his .319 batting average from last year.

We just didn’t have the money to keep him. The Forbes 2018 ranking of MLB team’s monetary value had the Royals in third-to-last place. With a ranking like that, there isn’t enough money to acquire players who’d make the @Royals Twitter alerts I receive less painful to look at. I’m not saying baseball players are gold diggers, but the number of zeroes certainly affects their team selection.

Maybe this is just a rebuilding year, an off year. Maybe next season Hosmer’s helmet hair, Jarrod Dyson’s speed and Johnny Cueto’s pre-pitch shoulder shrug will be back in the form of some young, new key players. Maybe the newbies will improve a LOT in Surprise, Arizona and I won’t be scared to turn on channel 205 and see the exact number of runs we’re losing by.

Here’s to hoping.