Am I on the Correct Side of the Road: An opinion on Kansas City drivers and their inability to drive safely

As I’m driving down Ward Parkway, I question my sanity as I see a glossy black Chevrolet facing me. — is that a car coming towards me?

I quickly jerk the steering wheel, swerving my car away from the SUV barreling towards me on the completely wrong side of the road — like the boulder from “Raiders of the Lost Ark.” I look back as the car quickly turns onto the nearest side street unscathed. I refocus on the road — blowing my near-accident off like it was nothing.

Later that day, I thought to myself: Was that normal?

But crazy drivers are far too present across Kansas. Whether it’s someone crossing all four lanes to exit off of I-35 or Metcalf, where speed limits are an afterthought. I’ve come to the conclusion that Kansas drivers suck.

And it turns out there’s data to back up the poor reflexes of Kansas citizens. According to Forbes, Kansas is the third-most-traffic-accident-prone state.

My favorite statistic used for this Forbes study on traffic accidents was “An accident involving a driver driving the wrong way” in which Kansas scored 42.6 crashes a year. I still can’t tell whether this data is amusing or scary, but I also feel that Kansas drivers have crossed state lines into Missouri. Especially in Kansas City.

My sister had an apartment downtown with a direct view of the city streets. Most notably the maze of one-way streets that surrounded the building. Almost every time I visited, I would see a driver speeding down the wrong way of a one-way, dodging and weaving through the maze of parked cars and pedestrians. A few seconds later, I would spot a police interceptor doing the same thing.

And this isn’t just about crazy drivers, but also ignorant drivers. Specifically East drivers. 

A scene that every student driver knows too well is the senior lot at 2:41 p.m. Like a stampede, students rush to their cars before the line forms and traffic is at a 20-minute standstill. Or when you’re walking to your car after staying late after school and you see a new racing stripe etched onto your car (courtesy of the driver parked next to you).

As I question if I’m driving on the correct side of the street, I consider myself lucky that I’ve never gotten into a harmful crash, and I worry for whoever hit my car on Nov. 8 at 3:11 p.m. Mark my words, I will find you.