The Harbinger Online

My Sister Says…She’ll Miss Me


Dear Courtney,

In ten days, you’ll be 17. 365 days after that, you’ll be 18. And soon after, you’ll be off to college. Just the thought of it makes my heart feel heavy.

Who will I go on walks with on random warm days in the middle of February?

Who will tell me to turn down the volume on my Netflix at promptly 10:15 every night?

Who will make me feel bad about myself for not reading enough and eating too much junk food?

Who will tell me when my outfit is absolutely atrocious without hurting my feelings?

Who will help me realize that my problems are so insignificant compared to the horrors outside of the Jo-Co bubble?

Who will I go on Mixx or Chipotle dates with?

Who will keep me occupied at every family dinner?

Who will try to stop me from making bad decisions when I’m only gonna do it anyways? And who will tell me “I told you so” after?

You are my everything, and I never thought that I would become as close to you as I have. When you leave, I honestly don’t know what I’ll do. It brings those happy-sad tears to my eyes knowing you’ll end up somewhere like Northwestern, Michigan or Brown. I’ll be so proud but also broken-hearted because you will be so far away from me. Can’t you just settle for community college? Or just not go at all?

I think I’ll cry for days when you leave me. Actually, I know I’ll cry for days when you leave me. So for now, let’s just make the most of the time we have left. For all of the fights to come, I promise that I am sincerely sorry.

I promise that when I steal your clothes it’s really because I want to be just like you.

I promise that when I call you a psycho or a hypocrite, it’s because I know you’re right and I have nothing else to say.

I promise that when I won’t go out with you it’s because I’m not in the mood to feel inferior to you – because you are so much greater than me even in the smallest ways.

I promise to keep on giving mom crap and keep on ruining family vacations.

I promise to never rat you out for anything ever again – sorry about that last one.

I promise that deep down I love you with everything I am, even though it doesn’t always seem that way.

Happy birthday to you, my sweet sister. I promise I won’t ruin this one.


Your Baby Sis

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